It can be excruciatingly painful.
It’s that grey space that most everyone finds terrifying, terrible and chaotic.
It is the ultimate test of patience, endurance and stamina.
It is the ultimate predictor of how your pessimism or optimism plays into your ability to cope.
It is the ultimate exposure of the degree of your faith in yourself and in a higher power.
So, what are you supposed to DO while you wait?
Waiting pushes you against every boundary that you have.
It slowly and methodically scrapes along those vulnerable and inflamed lines of anxiety and fear.
And, it asks you to give into it.
It beckons you to surrender to the understanding that “what will be will be”.
And, you have no control over “waiting”.
You MUST endure.
You MUST learn to handle the waiting.
Now, I’m not saying that you can’t do things that distract you from your waiting.
But still, you can do nothing about the process of waiting.
BUT HOW DO I LEARN TO WAIT AND NOT GO CRAZY?
Here are some things to think about that might help you.
- Ask yourself what are you REALLY waiting for.
You might be waiting for a test result, a decision from someone else that will open doors for you in your life, you may be waiting on the person you love to tell you that they love you and want to spend the rest of their life with you or you might be waiting on a package to arrive in the mail.
Regardless of the circumstance, the issue underneath the waiting is always the same; You are waiting for permission to move forward with knowledge.
Not knowing tortures you.
So, too, can knowing.
It’s what you do with that information that matters.
Once you accept that the purpose of having to wait impacts how you functioning on a daily basis, you will then be able to go onto the next point.
- Waiting spotlights the virtues that you lack.
According to Wikipedia, “The first virtues were identified by the Greek philosophers Aristotle and Plato, who regarded temperance, wisdom, justice, and courage as the four most desirable character traits. After the New Testament was written, these four virtues became known as the cardinal virtues, while faith, hope and charity were referred to as the theological virtues.”
There is a list of the seven heavenly virtues to oppose the seven deadly sins:
Chastity: the act of acting purely, abstaining from sexual conduct to be a pure, honest and wise person.
Temperance: Restraint. Maintaining a constant state mindfulness of others and one’s surroundings; practicing self-control, abstention, moderation and deferred gratification.
Charity: Good will, benevolence, generosity, sacrifice.
Diligence: Persistence, effort, ethics, decisive work ethic, steadfastness in belief, fortitude, and the capability of not giving up. Upholding one’s convictions at all times, especially when no one else is watching: (integrity).
Patience: Accepting the grace to forgive, being able to create a sense of peaceful stability and community rather than suffering, hostility, and antagonism.
Kindness: The ability to unselfishly love and show voluntary kindness without bias or spite. Having positive outlooks and cheerful demeanor and that you inspire kindness in others.
Humility: Bravery, modesty, altruism, selflessness, and modesty.
According to Christianity, these virtues are said to be the stepping stones for the glorification of the soul.
Even though I am Jewish, I do believe in these virtues, along with others, such as seeing the goodness in others, learning from mistakes, and giving back to others and the world, just to name a few.
Waiting forces you to examine those very virtues that need to grow within you.
For me, waiting typically causes me a significant amount of anxiety; like waiting for mammogram results, or getting into graduate school, or waiting to hear that someone you love is safe, if they are traveling.
At others times, I can stand in my rational mind and categorize the occurrence as “something that I can’t control and I need to go with the flow.”
Think about what waiting provokes within you.
Do you need to practice patience or compassion towards yourself and others?
Do you need to take a step back from your desire to be ‘right’ and practice humility; accepting how you have contributed to the situation you are in and the feelings you have about it so that you can learn and grow?
Take a moment and see what resonates.
- Waiting is in direct conflict with our “get it now” society and forces you to identify what you value and the rules around what you value.
What can I say?
We want what we want when we want it.
As you know, life doesn’t always work out that way.
We are tested every day around the things we value and the rules that support that value.
If you value love then you have ways that you can be shown that someone loves you.
If you value honesty, you have ways (rules) that your need for honesty is met by someone else and within yourself.
If you value living authentically, then your rules around that value have specific characteristics such as learning to say no in spite of what people might think or supporting a cause that matters to you.
Regardless of what you value and the rules that are connected to it, life gives you moments where you MUST learn to sit in the waiting room and wait for the notification that you can do something else.
It’s just part of life.
So, what do you do in while you are waiting?
The most important thing you can do while you wait is to:
Find the lesson in the waiting
Plain and simple.
Waiting serves a wonderful purpose.
We are to learn from it.
The question for you is “what is your waiting asking you to learn?”
I have learned to wait.
And, for someone like me with ADD, who tends to be impulsive, it has been a real challenge at times.
Humility has played a major role in my ability to step back and see the richness in waiting.
I have experienced being humiliated to test my commitment to being angry at unfairness and to test my ability to practice patience and compassion, when all I want to do I crawl out of my skin as well as to test my faith in Spirit.
Waiting is both a test and testimony.
You just have to figure out how to make it the testimony.
So, how will you learn to wait through the waiting?
Start now and take a seat.
Someone will be with you shortly. 🙂