Leave Proof You Existed

Janis Cohen leave a legacy

“Everything is Everything.”
~The Tao of Wu

“I want to be remembered for something, anything.  I just want to be remembered.”, she said.

“What do you want to be remembered for?”, I asked.

“At least that I was here.  That I existed.  That I mattered.  That I made a difference. That I was worth something.” she said with melancholy.

“What would that look like?”, I asked. Continue reading

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Your Agreement and The Sacrifice

janis cohen 3

She needed her car.

She had to get around town.

Her tire was blown and the rim was shot.

She has no family. A few friends. No partner.  No kids.  And, very little money.

She really needed her car.

Somehow, she found a way; she finally maxed out her credit card.

She fixed it all.  She had her car back.

But she was still broke financially and in emotional pain. Continue reading

My Giving is Just as Good as Your Giving.

gift in hand

Comparing ourselves to others is natural.  We can’t help it.

We notice how other people look, what they drive, how much money they have, their social status, academic accomplishments, and degree of public notoriety (among many other things) and compare ourselves to them; noticing what we have or lack.

We, then, come to one of these assumptions:
1. I am, have, do enough and therefore I am happy.
2. I am mediocre, need to do more, and therefore I feel ok about me/my life.
3. I am not enough and therefore I am unhappy. Continue reading

Chasingo Validation? Here’s Why and How You Can Get Off That Crazy Train.

janis cohen hampster on a wheel

She is 27 years old. Bright, attractive, and unhappy.

Originally, she sought out my services because she said, “I’m dating two people and I am feeling the pressure of which one to choose.”

As it turns out, this really wasn’t the core issue.

Continue reading

Why Trying to Please Everyone is Futile

An old man, a boy and a donkey were going to town.  The boy rode on the donkey and the old man walked beside him.  As they went along they passed some people who remarked it was a shame the old man was walking and the boy was riding.  The man and boy thought maybe the critics were right, so they changed positions. Continue reading

Hearing is Believing: How Words Can Make or Break Your Kids

Words standing alone, are useless.  When put into a context, matched with  a tone of voice and the underlying intention of the speaker, they can lift you up to the peak of happiness or they can bring you crashing down into the depths of despair.  Words are powerful tools; and when you  use them with your children, you can make or break their spirit; because children listen to what you say. Continue reading

Destiny

You can look… and you will FIND it. 

You can not look… and you WILL find it. 

That which is yours will surely come to you.”

(Daniel Levin)

What is this thing called destiny?  Do you believe that your life has a specific direction and purpose? Do you believe that regardless of how you choose to live your life, that there are forces beyond you that collude, communicate, and contribute to your life without your consent?

“A tapestry of events that culminate into a life plan”….”A pre-determined course of events often held to be an irresistible power”… is this even true? Continue reading