“Ok, now what?” How a 16 year old girl changed her life in minutes.

janis cohen 28

Like a deer in headlights.  That’s what she looked like.

Eyes open wide and completely unsure of what to expect.

She had never done this before and it showed.

And, when asked if she had, she answered with only a head shake from side to side, eyes locked on mine.

The timer was set.

Pressing start, we began.

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Revenge: Is It Really Sweet?

I know you have had several times in your life where you have wanted to take revenge on someone who caused you pain.   I certainly have.  In fact, I can identify three times in my life where I have wanted to take revenge so profoundly that I would dream about it at night and fantasize about it during the day.  The desire to take revenge inside me was very strong and it took a great deal of work, on my part, not to act on it.

The passion for revenge is powerful and can be overwhelming.  It is a primitive, destructive, and sometimes violent response to injury, anger, or humiliation.

It is a misguided attempt to transform shame into pride, to become a victor instead of victim, to punish the perpetrator equally, if not more than you were pained, and to transform your sense of powerlessness into power. Continue reading