The Person You Would Rather Not Be

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They are real.

You can feel them but you can’t always see them.

They lurk around the corner. Masterfully weave themselves into your life.  They are bold, ruthless, and take prisoners.

They will haunt you until they are stopped.

Are you ready to stop them?

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Eliminate Anxiety in 4 Easy Steps!

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We’ve all been there; gripped by the intense emotional and physical arousal that stops us in our tracks.

Your Heart pounds, it’s hard to breathe, you begin to feel really hot and start to sweat and the dizziness sets in.  You have to sit down because the nausea it hitting you.

This is anxiety and it can be bad.

And depending on how you respond to it and what you do when it hits you, anxiety can actually be useful and perhaps even beneficial! Continue reading

If You Run From Confrontation, Take a Breather and Read This!

If I were to ask you what your definition of confrontation is, what would you tell me?

You might say. “Janis, the idea of confronting someone makes me want to vomit!  You may be someone who believes that confrontation means that there’s yelling, insulting and criticism involved.  Maybe you define confrontation as something that never turns out well.

Today’s post is all about how to understand what confrontation truly means, what fears underly those who avoid confrontation and how you can think differently about speaking up for yourself, so that you don’t take the easy way out of a situation; giving up an opportunity to let go of unnecessary unhappiness. Continue reading

Teaching Your Children How to Be Comfortable With Uncertainty

A child’s life, essentially, doesn’t belong to him.  He comes into this world with a push and then must rely on his caretakers to provide him with his basic needs.  And, as he grows up, everything is predetermined for him; adults decide what time he goes to bed, with whom he plays, what he eats, when he sleeps and very little is left for him to take control of, except what he chooses to comply with or resist.  For a child, living in uncertainty, at times, is a given, despite how much parents attempt to create safety.  There is always a new experience, new person, new thing, and new way that must be faced by kids, every day. Continue reading

Lie Number 4

Really?  That’s all you have to say?  Lie number four focuses on the “easy out” you give yourself when you are asked to explain why something has happened. Even when people are voluntarily in a therapeutic setting, this is the first thing that flies out of their mouth when inquiry occurs about an obstacle.   This lie is regurgitated so often and by so many, that saying it somehow becomes acceptable.  Kids do it all the time when they don’t want to get in trouble after they have gotten caught for doing something they shouldn’t have.   But this lie, as adults use it, isn’t about getting caught; it’s about what you are willing to do to uncover what lies beneath and defines how willing you are to be honest with yourselfCheck out lie number four. Continue reading