“Betrayal is the only truth that sticks.”
~ Arthur Miller
You are in a relationship or are dating someone and feel confident (or mostly confident) that all is well.
Sure, you encounter challenges, but every relationship has them, right?
One day, you find something out that you can’t ‘un-know’.
You feel like you have just been sucker punched in the gut and your body shakes in confirmation. You’ve been betrayed.
Your world has shifted in an unexpected direction.
What do you do now?
She needed her car.
She had to get around town.
Her tire was blown and the rim was shot.
She has no family. A few friends. No partner. No kids. And, very little money.
She really needed her car.
Somehow, she found a way; she finally maxed out her credit card.
She fixed it all. She had her car back.
But she was still broke financially and in emotional pain. Continue reading
Expectations are a part of all relationships, including the relationship you have with yourself. They are the deal breakers.
You expect others to be a certain way and, if you are intuitive enough, you get what you expect by expecting the right things from the right people. Continue reading
You know you have done this; noticed something about someone, when you initially meet them, that causes you to furrow your brow and feel uneasy but then brushed it aside. We have all done that, at one time or another.
Whether it’s a new friend or in a new dating relationship, the red flags are always there from the beginning. The challenge you face is whether or not you are going to honor yourself enough to acknowledge what you already know or whether you will choose to ignore the warning signs and put yourself in harms’ way. Continue reading
If you are like most parents, you do your best to be involved in your children’s lives by asking about their day, who they played with at recess, with whom they ate lunch and what their homework is for the night. You attend their school events, taxi them around to various play dates and parties and do what you can to keep an eye on their emotional and psychological well-being. Sometimes life gets in the way and you miss an opportunity to dig deeper. And, as kids age into adolescence, the window for involvement quickly shrinks, and before you know it, the only response you get from your tween or teen is a shrug or an “uh-huh.” Continue reading
Those of us who have brothers and sisters, whether they are biological or step siblings, know that these relationships deeply define us. Depending on the pecking order, you can be the one held responsible or the one to blame for everything. You can be the caretaker, the troublemaker, the high achiever, or the quiet one who tends to slip between the cracks. While the pecking order impacts the relationships we have with our siblings as we grow up, it can change in adulthood. How it evolves results from the value that parents place on family and connectedness along with modeling what connectedness looks like over time. Continue reading
~~Love After Love~~
The time will come when,
with elation you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other’s welcome,
and say, Sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was yourself.
Give wine. Give Bread. Give back your heart to itself,
to the stranger who has loved you
all your life, whom you ignored for another,
who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,
the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.
In love and light,
“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at anytime.”
Gene Simmons’s show, Family Jewels, is a reality show; and a very interesting one at that. In last night’s episode, he and his future wife, at the time it was taped, Shannon, attended a program called “The Marriage Boot Camp.” This program was designed to break through the barriers that prevents couples from finding true happiness and fosters emotional intimacy.
The major issue for Gene and Shannon was his infidelity, which had been heavily hidden throughout their 28 year relationship. Only recently was his cheating behavior discovered, as photos of him, being with other women, were leaked to the internet. Continue reading